I wake up every morning
To see the brightness of the sky
But I feel its dullness
Everyday
My hunger for food is a mood
I hope to be full
But no matter how much I beg
I don’t get full not to ask for more
Oliver Twist you might see in me
But my sight for the future is bleak
Education we fight for
People like me might never win
At 10 years old I don’t know my ABC,
The ABCs to making a living
But the 10s of 10 naira I make from begging
Makes me think I know mathematics
Since I was born I eat with no spoon
But shouldn’t be deprived
From having my children
Born with a silver spoon
Poverty the disease I live with
Eating deep into the life
I keep with pain
Life we the living all have
But what then is living without a life
If my future is Cautioned with Education
Poverty and Crime I would be armed to fight
With my full might
Till the full moon night
But not now
When no help comes from the sky
But under the ground
Written and composed by Taiwo, Kehinde Oluwaseyi
The poem depicts the status quo of our beloved country,showing the helplessness and hopelessness of the situation. It begs for even a glimmer of Hope at the end, but that would've been a lie...nice piece...painfully true but perfectly depicted..doing justice to the clichè 'The truth is bitter'
ReplyDeleteThanks Dahyor for the very thought-provoking feedback from your evaluation of this piece. Indeed, education is the root to strengthening the nation and no one should ever undermine the words... Knowledge is Power
ReplyDeleteOnce again, thanks a bunch!
Thank you
DeleteThought-provoking. We all must think of what we'll do to change the trend!
ReplyDeleteThank you Sir for your comment. It indeed underscored the basis for the poem. Cheers.
DeleteNice one
ReplyDeleteThank you very much. I appreciate
DeleteSo insightful. Truly, education is the best legacy. More power to your elbow! Nice one sir.
ReplyDeleteThanks Ann, comment well appreciated
DeleteNice wooow
ReplyDeleteI like you
ReplyDeleteOh thanks for the comment. I should get back into these pieces. Been a long time off with so much to talk about.
ReplyDeleteThe poem captures a child’s struggle with poverty, hunger, and the longing for a better life. It contrasts their reality with privilege, emphasizing a desire for education and change, despite feeling abandoned and hopeless.
ReplyDeleteThe strengths of the poem
¡. Emotional impact
¡¡. Symbolism of imagery
¡¡¡. Relatable voice
Areas for improvement
1. Clarity and flow, some lines feel a bit disconnected.
2. Structure and rhyme, there’s no consistency in your rhyme or structure.
3. Language precision.